PARTIAL NEWS

Faithful friends and family,

I have partial news.  The lab work in California is completed and the results have been faxed to Dr. Singh at Johns Hopkins.  Dr. Singh received the results today, so we are talking hot off the press.  (I found this out from the lab.)  I emailed Dr. Singh’s assistant to find out what the results were and this was the assistant’s response, “Rebecca, take a deep breath and relax.  Dr. Singh just got back in the country.  Once he tells me what next, I will let you know.”

Relax!  I was supposed to get these results at the LATEST by Wednesday and NOW it is Friday.  Relax!  I have been in horrific pain for over 5 months going on 6 months and the pain has only gotten worse.  Relax!  I never know when these attacks are coming or how long they will last.  Relax!  My disability insurance wants to terminate coverage.  Relax!  I am concerned about losing my job.  Relax!  I have been on a liquid diet for over 2 weeks!  Relax!

I waited as patiently as I could.  After 6 hours of waiting (not to mention the past 5 weeks), I called the assistant and asked, “Is Dr. Singh in the office today? If not, when is he returning?”  I thought maybe the results could be faxed to my primary care physician.  The assistant informed me that Dr. Singh is in surgery all day today, but did look over my lab results.  He would like to meet with me face to face to go over different options.  His schedule is booked solid for over a month, but the assistant will try to get me an appointment to see Dr. Singh in 2 weeks.  (No appointment date at this time.)

This is why I say partial news.  The lab work is completed, but I will not know what the next step is until I meet with Dr. Singh.  More waiting.  <Sigh>  However, I feel more at peace knowing the lab work is complete and there are options.  I promise to keep you posted, once I know more. 

Thank you for your continued prayers.  I have felt like I was in Gethsemane for the past few days – I have felt rejected by God and crushed with guilt, fear, stress and confusion.  I trust there is purpose to the endurance of physical, emotional and spiritual pain, but Jack and I are in a fragile and depleted place.  It is challenging to stay positive.  One of my favorite songs is Blessed Be Your Name.  One of the lyrics is “you give and take away, but my heart will choose to say, blessed be your name”.  This is what Jack and I are choosing.  We are thanking God even though we cannot yet see the blessings.  Would you join us in thanking and praising God?  He has provided us with an amazing community of love, support and encouragement…that is YOU!  God has also blessed us with medical care and provision for our every need.  My prayer request this evening would be for restful sleep, eyes that see beyond the circumstances, and a peaceful heart and mind.  Please remember Jack in your prayers, as he is strong for me, but weary as well.  Blessings to each of you.

Love and gratitude,

Becky